Thoughts from the Penguin Pit

random thoughts on my past weight.

2011-04-19T14:47:00.003-03:00

I've been asked why I'm so defensive about overweight people being ridiculed, since I'm not part of that group of people anymore.

Well, other than the fact that I think most people who have lost weight can understand, that you never stop feeling like you're big, I'll explain.

I'm more sensitive about people being insensitive about obesity NOW than I was then.
for many reasons.
for one, because society was constantly bashing me on the head with the belief, a part of me always thought it was my fault i was big. and not in a "i'm not trying" way, because i was, but in a "I'm a bad person" way.
secondly, now that I've made it here, I know how hard it was. So I hate it when people judge those who haven't yet reached the finish line - that judgement is only making it harder for them.

I also have seen just how HUGELY differently I'm treated as a thin person than when I was big, and that hurts me to the core.

- many of my guy friends treat me better and want more time with me. insulting, since they're clearly shallow, my personality hasn't changed, so how come they are more interested in my opinions now than then?

- people in general are friendlier. I don't know why, but it's across the map. ('cept with larger women. i find large women treat me the same as ever, but if they hear that I USED to be big, they suddenly like me better. think this is because they can relate to me then, and they know i'm not judging them.)

- I get parts a little more easily in plays. I understand this, the world is an unfortunately shallow place, and they want the leading lady traditionally hot. that's part of the reason I lost weight in the first place. but it makes me greive for the girl i was who was just as talented but always got small roles.

- i truly beleive i was beautiful when i was big. i was not HOT, but i was beautiful, I thought so then and i think so now - i wanted to be hot too, which is why i lost weight. but i feel now how much further being "hot" gets me, how many more guys check me out, and (not that i don't like it, but..) that also hurts the little chubby girl inside me. because i know so many BEAUTIFUL big women, who don't get the attention i beleive they deserve because people get stopped by the weight.
Not all "fat" Is 100% unhealthy, some of the healthiest and most active women i know are still a bit "heavy". fitness doesn't always mean thinness.

a short rebuttal: The Golden Compass

2008-01-01T14:29:00.001-04:00

Quote:
Re: The Golden Compass

Apppparently, the author of those books, when he wrote them, his purpose in writing them was to kill God in the hearts of children. I am thusly avoiding that one.

i've heard that a million times

soooo not the case though.

that's what every Christian protector thought and publicized to make people ban the book

yes, he's an atheist, but personally the book is EXTREMELY spiritual.
it merely puts the notion of "god" in a new form
something which MANY authors have done

he's against ORGANIZED religion in the book,
but when the he speaks of the one particular character who changes religion (a nun who stops being catholic)
it's not because she LOSES FAITH, it's because her RELIGION is holding her back from experiencing the rest of the world,
and she believed that there was even more to god and spirituality and the world than her religion was letting her see.

"Dust" is the most important thing in the book, the life force and what makes people human, what makes them love and create and be.
it's the thing that ties humanity together,
and that is his notion of "god".. which is VERY similar to a common belief in a "uni-soul" or universal soul, which is how many people perceive god.

in fact, the bad guys in the book are people who are trying to destroy dust.
so in fact, Phillip Pullman was technically defending god in these books.

i read the books when i was 12-13 - the exact same age as the characters in the book,
and it merely encouraged my growth of spirituality,
it encouraged questions about my religion a bit, yes
but only in favour of expanding my faith.

Numbers from the Crazy Lady.

2007-09-23T04:21:00.000-03:00

I'll skip the introduction and just jump right in.

I have to wonder if anyone else does this...

I give genders and sometimes colours to numbers and letters...
Is that crazy?

For example, When i see the Letter B, I see a female. She is sometimes green, but usually Purple.

When I see a 6, it is a blue or green male.

C is yellowish orange, and also male.

3 is a female, but has no fixed colour as of yet.

Y is male and X&Z are both female...
2 and 9 are male, while 5 and 8 are female..

and so on and so forth.

the other thing i do is give numbers little stories, to go with their personalities...
this is just a fun thing i do in my head.. Don't ask me why.

before i say anything, i have nothing for 1. 1 is neutral, genderless, and probably white.

you'd think that would be 0, but 0 is better, 0 is the all seeing master of all, and has NO colour.

HERE'S HOW IT IS!

2 and 3 are both young and innocent, and they're really good friends..
I worry for 3, though, because her role model is 5, who's a bit of a bitch and likes to say nasty things about people behind their backs..

But there's hope, because 8 is older and wiser, and often takes 3 under her wing.

9 is much like a male version of 5, and 5 has quite the crush on him, though he couldn't care less.

7 is a sweetheart, but shyer than his best friend, 6, who is far more extroverted.

6 is also a very nice guy, though he is known to be a bit careless, unintentionally.

4 is 8's little brother.
4 is a little geeky, and a little awkward, but we know he'll turn out well, as all geeky kids do.

so, thats my story.

just thought i'd share..
heh, still be my friends after reading this, K? woot!

<3

Rose .:

Curves

2007-08-20T06:32:00.000-03:00

I dislike it when people say, "Curvy people are beautiful too."
or, "Not only skinny people are Beautiful"

I understand that these people are TRYING to be all inclusive by saying this..
but instead they're only succeeding in being condescending.

It's like saying the world is just discovering that curvy people have value
but that's not the case,
curves were THE sex symbol for decades,
look at Marilyn Monroe and Mae West,
they were the sex figures of their times and both much higher than a size 2.

then when the popular body type changed to Twiggy,
that was fine, styles change all the time,

but people suddenly changed their view
it's like they decided curvy people should be pittied because skinny was MORE beautiful

that's exactly what it is.

PITY.

we LOVE our bodies, we don't want to be PITTIED,
We don't NEED to be pittied!
Pity makes us feel theres something WRONG.
there's nothing wrong, it's ALL beautiful.
we don't need to be told, "don't worry, we all know you're not skinny, but it's okay, you're beautiful, too!"

we know it's beautiful, we just want the world to re-realize it,
to stop telling US and start telling THEMSELVES.

My Confidence

2007-08-13T01:30:00.000-03:00

For years i put up a wall of fake confidence
Because that way it was easier to put up with all the snubs and pokes i got from being different
Even if i was bothered by it, I could pretend i wasn't, and people would somehow believe me.

I've always been different.
I knew that wasn't going to change, and i didn't WANT to try to fit in with everyone else.
I liked who I was, I couldn't help it if some other people didn't.

Then for a few years i retreated into my little bat cave.
- the drama room -
It was in there that I embraced my individuality instead of slightly fearing it..

When I reached grade 12 it suddenly felt like I'd actually been shoved in a closet for years, and I was seeing all the faces of my school from a whole new perspective

This time when the girls decided to dislike something about me, their insecurities were so vivid, it was amazing.
I suddenly saw that that were intimidated by me,
and with that knowledge, their snubs just made me feel stronger.

In that year I think they realized that they could no longer harm me, too..
And i enjoyed myself at school entirely, for the first time in my life.

~

The Cheap Drunk

2007-03-18T21:54:00.000-03:00

No one take offense to this post, it's just my personal rant about me.

I'm Tired of being treated like a child.
I was told recently that the fact that I'm a cheap drunk is "sad." It was quite an innocent comment, said jokingly, and really not intended in a harmful way by the person who said it..

But it made me realize that there are some who really do think that of me, and other so-called "cheap drunks". That it is something to be pitied, as if it was something I should work on.
Did they never consider that perhaps the reason I don't drink all the time isn't because I'm a "prude," another name I've been called, but maybe because I don't actually enjoy being drunk?
That I'm not a sheep, and won't just follow the crowd to have fun, or do what makes me uncomfortable just because of what others might think of me?

That perhaps the people who really should be pitied are the ones who can't go a week without getting drunk or high at least once, so that it's becoming a serious health risk?

I don't enjoy being drunk all that much. Yes, it can be enjoyable and relaxing, and creates some giggles..
But I dislike not being able to control myself.
And I dislike the way people look at me..
Belittling.
Condescending.
I know this is how people look at me when I'm drunk, because I do it myself.
I don't like the idea that my friends can't be comfortable confiding in me, they can't trust me, or find comfort in me.
I know, because that's how I feel around my intoxicated friends.
How do I know they'll remember the conversation in the morning?
How do I know if they're even listening, not just focused on counting my eyelashes?

On a related matter,
A friend once said of me, "You can tell Rose has never been high!"
For a minute I wanted to slug her.
As if the fact that she had made her better, more experienced.
As if it made me innocent and inexperienced and naive.

How dare she turn my struggle and strength against peer pressure into something laughable?
All too often I have seen my friends fall deeply into those habits, and eventually struggle to get out of them, often without success.
All too often they think that they are different.
That THEY won't get addicted.
That THEY can stop any time they wish to.
News Flash: You ARE addicted.

"Live a Little," They tell me.

Did it never occur to them that I am living?
That this is the way I want my life to be, and I want it to continue to be that way?
That the life, the hope of the future I really want might be destroyed if I fall into a pattern like that? Just as many people prove daily.

I'm happy with who I am becoming now.
So I'll continue to do what makes me comfortable.

And that is my Rant.

I'd Rather be Reading..

2007-02-01T21:25:00.000-04:00

Here's a quiz I stole from M-tha

1. Honestly, what color is your underwear? Borning Grey.. :(

2. Honestly, whats on your mind right now? “Who’s afraid of the big bad world? Nobody loves a chicken. Who’s afraid of the big bad world? Get some Guts and Feel no Fear”.. Cuz I’ listening to that right now. Also, Pan’s Labyrinth is in my mind... It’ll be there for a few days!.. I’m also contemplating UIMF singing... and how I’m going to tell the Museum I don’t want to be there anymore.. Agh!

3. Honestly, what are you doing right now? I was Reading a new book! “Fairest”.. I’m looking forward to it.

4. Honestly, what did you do today? .. Well, I woke up with Kyle.. then had a shower.. J .. and then saw Talissa and bought 2 movies and a book. Yay!

5. Honestly, do you think you are attractive? Yup. Maybe I’m an acquired taste to some, but I’m not uggos.. I have no uggo friends.. and I count myself among them. Sometimes I wish I had a little less tub.. but that too is slowly depleting.

6. Honestly, have you done something bad today? lol, who's the Judge? To most of my friends.. doubtful. To my mom.. maybe. To a health food expert, probably. To my grandparents, definately. To me... no.

7. Honestly, do you watch disney channel? Not a jot. No Cable anyway.

8. Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now? Everyone going to school right now, I am Jealous of. And Emmy Rossum.

9. Honestly, what makes you happy most of the time? Kyle, acting, and singing.. and doing Art.

10. Honestly, do you bite your nails? Nope, not a jot!

11. Honestly, what is your mood right now? So-so.. my finger hurts, and i don't know why.. and i have a cold.. but otherwise I'm fine.. I want to be reading my book, but instead i'm writing this silly Blog.. lol.

12.Honestly, have you had an eating disorder? No.. when I was younger I may have eaten more than I should have, which is why I was slightly overweight.. but It really wasn't a disorder so much as little-child-without-self-discipline-syndrome.

13. Honestly, do you want to see someone this very minute? PEOPLE in general.. And I always want to see Kyle.. I'll see my choir Folk tonight, and I'm looking forward to that!

14. Honestly, do you have a deep dark secret? haha.. not so much. Maybe.. we all have our secrets.. I couldn't call them all that dark though.. at least not the ones I've never told anyone.

16. Honestly, do you hate someone right now? Erm.. hate is a strong Word.. I don't think I hate anyone.. there are a few ppl who's asses I very much want to kick the living daylights out of, and sense into.. but not hate.

17. Honestly, who/what do you want to hug right now? Talissa because she needs one.. and Becka, though she'd never let me, because of her poor bike.. and Kyle.. Because his hugs are what make me feel best.

18. Honestly, are you loyal? Very.. Can be more than some at times.. as far as friends go, I will always stand up for them, and I will not betray them.

19. Honestly, are you in denial? lol, about what? I might be in denial about CCPA.. maybe I only don't want to go because they didn't accept me. But I don't think so.. I truely don't think it's the right place for me. I do admit I'd love to go to randolph though... If it wasn't in Toronto. I DON'T want to go to toronto.

20. Honestly, wouldn't you rather be having sex right now? ... lol.. yes. of course. . what kind of question is that?? who would say no?? a nun.. ha, but

21. Honestly, who is your best friend? Erm.. lately I'd say Talissa. . I'm not afraid of hurting anyone by saying that, since I don't see anyone anyway, lol. I tell her everything, and vice versa.. and if anyone hurts her, I kick their asses.

22. Honestly, have you ever consumed alcohol? hahahahaha... yes. I like Sourpuss Jello.. but I hate any other kind of Jello . . .

23. Honestly, do you like someone? *loves*.. who does you think?

24. Honestly, does anyone like you? haha, I'm pretty sure. But other than Kyle.. I don't know. It'd be nice to have people crushing on me.. I know people HAVE liked me, but I don't know about anymore.

25. Honestly, is it going anywhere with them? Yes.

26. Honestly, did you answer all these questions honestly? Yes, I'd say so. 'cept for the underwear one.. they also have specks of white on them.

2007-01-24T04:15:00.000-04:00

I have to make a change, somehow in the way my life is running.

A person like myself cannot be satisfied without human interaction. I live off people. I thrive off human contact. If i didn't have Kyle and Talissa to keep me running I would wither. They are almost the only people I see. They're the two I see most regularly, at least.

I find my inspiration is dying out, too.. I haven't been able to finish a good picture in quite a while. Sketching I've done, and I'm learning to become better, mostly through what I'm learning off the internet. But it isn't enough, I can't find anything to truly inspire me to create real art.

I've found that as I have gotten farther away from the drama of highschool life, the more I am repulsed by it when I encounter it. I'll hear of a situation happening among friends, a common one in highschool.. and I realize I don't want to have to deal with that. Is this right? How can I find a way to be with those people I adore, without delving back into that hole of self esteem issues and highschool style hierarchy that I struggled so hard to get out of? I'm so happy to be out of highschool. But I'm not pleased to drift apart from my friends.

Maybe this realization is a sign of growing up? A sign of moving on? Maybe the thing I need is to find a whole new blend of friends.. But can I ever find people as fabulous as those I grew up with? Maybe there is a way to keep in touch with the ones I already have, but it is difficult..

It's something everyone feels at some point.. the keen realization that you probably won't know your highschool era friends forever. No matter how you work against it, it will still happen. For me it seems to be happening without my control, I have no power over it.. I don't want to force myself to go to school in order to see them, before I know what I want to do.

And I don't know what to do.

*please keep in mind, I'm PMS-ing as I write this, so I can't be completely in control of my own feelings :S

Mindnog

2007-01-07T03:40:00.000-04:00

More and more I'm seeing the world through different eyes. Sometimes it's only a flash of the new perspective, but sometimes it lasts long enough for me to take hold of it and examine it's eccentricities. The details, it's this colourful, kaleidoscopic new fragment of fact that is so different from every angle.. yet at every angle, it is still fact. Things in my life are constantly changing, and now faster and faster, and I'm getting older and older and it doesn't want to stop, but it's good.. but it's terrifying. New thoughts invade the brain. Making decisions. Being in Love. Changing my direction. Making money. Trivial things from the past seemed so important once... What will my yearbook photo look like? What song should I sing in the school variety night? That person doesn't like me. I have a crush on that boy. Now those things matter less and less. The world looks bigger and I feel smaller, but at the same time I feel more alive, more human, more whole.
Bigger.
Are you really happy with who you are right now?
Hard question. Most of the time I say yes. Once in a while I'm not so sure. I hope I'm becoming the woman I want to be.

What is time? Everyone dreams of stopping time just once, to do the things they want to do. The only thing stopping us is the sun, and clocks. We should all stop our clocks tomorrow, and sleep in. and do what we want, all day long.

What is love? Who judges who is in love, what love feels like? We see a new couple, dating for a week, and they say they are in love, and most roll their eyes, saying they're rushing into things. Sometimes that's true. But sometimes those two will be the ones who last for years, only getting closer every minute they spend together. Why is love so different from how it used to be? Why are there so many divorces now, and so many happy old married couples? Why do I know I'm in love, when I can't even tell you what love is?

How can people treat death so calmly? How can a person be so ruthless as to let a person die for crimes they've committed, when what they probably need is help, not harm? How does that make the prosecutor less of a murderer? Murdering a child is the same as murdering a 45 year old. It's Human life. How can they write off a person's life as though it doesn't matter, and sleep well that night? Or maybe I'm the blind one. Maybe they do deserve death, maybe they are just crazy people who can't be cured, and should be wiped from the earth. But ouch.. That isn't the person I want to be.

Then I hear other peoples opinions, and sometimes I wonder at them.. It is amazing how ignorant we all are. We should never have opinions, not until we know all of the facts. If everyone took the time to learn about history - our own and others, to learn about culture, religion, art, literature.. they might have a broader view. The world would be so different if we just cared enough to learn. We're all more similar than we like to believe.

My mind is now in more of a mess than it was when I started out.. I can't even remember why I started. So now I'm stopping. 'Til tomorrow, then.

Names

2006-11-28T22:10:00.000-04:00

1.YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & color of underwear)

Scott White

I sound like some soft classic rock artist.. I am Jack Johnson, like, 2 decades ago.

2.YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (fav ice cream flavor, favorite cookie)

Moose Tracks Ginger

Come to me with your troubles, I have the shoulder to cry on, and the mallet to make your problems disappear.

3. YOUR "FLY Guy/Girl" NAME: (first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name)

R-McN

Yeh, That's not even pronouncable.

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME:(fav color and fav animal)

Red Penguin

Obviously I'm the foreign detective who keeps to herself.. and no one quite knows what it is I do... but they can tell I'm an expert. Even though I may look a bit silly at times, no one questions the Red Penguin.

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)

Siubhan Eastyork

I am snooty and upper-crust. A Young gold digger. At least one dead ex husband, soon to be more. I only associate with the finest.

6. YOUR STAR TREK NAME: (1st 3 letters of last name, first 2 letters of first name, last 3 letters of mom's maiden name)

Mcnrolan

Obvilously the 'n' is silent. (I don't know anything about Star trek... I'll just say I'm El-Aurian, like Guinan, cuz I love her character.. the listeners... Mcnrolan'd be good at that. Gotta love Whoopi Goldberg.

7. SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink)

Green Tea

... Mwa ha ha ha!! Mind powers are the specialty here.. as in... if a person was put against me in a fight they'd look at me and say, "pft, this won't take long. what have they got!?" Then all of a sudden i take control of their body, all the while standing calmly still.

8. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers)

Bill Rob or William Robert

yeh.. I know nothing about Nascar, so I'll just leave that.

9.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother & father's middle names)

Edith Russell

I'm sure I've heard that name before.

10. JEDI NAME (middle name backwards, mom's maiden name backwards)

Nabuis Nallelcm

That's Princess Nabuis to you. I'm very innocent and naive. But likely not for long, I'll be thrown into the tide of the rebellion before long. As one can tell my my last name, I have an ancestry filled with stories of intrigue and adventure.

I don't have any more. Sigh.

Sir Oakly versus Agatha the Zebra Queen

2006-11-01T01:01:00.000-04:00

Cast List: (and original actors)

Eli – Protagonist, Male love interest (Barb)

Isabella – Female love interest, ward of Agatha (Spencer C)

Sir Oakly – Wise man, part owl, unofficial ‘head’ of the good side (Rose)

Agatha – Evil Tyrant, ½ zebra, self proclaimed queen (Brianna)

Curly – Agatha’s henchman, Turquoise’s lover, in love with Agatha (Gareth)

Turquoise – Agatha’s daughter, evil seductress (Elina)

Sam – Messenger for good side (girl) (Lauren B)

Pam – Messenger for evil side (boy) (Drew M)

Babble – Sir Oakly’s part-ferret confident (stuffed animal)

Plot/Some backstory:

Sir Oakly & Agatha were formerly in love, split, and she turned evil; they created two warring sides.

Sir oakly gives Sam a message to send to Eli *our hero!*

Sam brings message to Eli, then carries on to spy on evil side, helping Eli in his mission.*

* message was calling Eli to duty for some kind of secret mission

Eli begins missiion, and meets Isabella. They instantly fall in love. Of course.

Isabella wishes to help Eli end Agatha's evil reign over the land, even though she's her ward.

In her snooping about the evil ppls palace, Sam meets Pam, and they also fall in love.

Curly has been in love with his mistress, Agatha, for all his time serving her, but she would never look that way at one so 'below' her. He found comfort in Turquoise, Agatha's beautiful, powerful, and overly sexual daughter. It is evident Curly suffers from some serious 'graduate-esque' issues.

Turquoise has never felt restricted to the castle, she's well over the age of being mother henned. In one of her frequent meanderings around the castle she sees Eli, who is more conventionally hansome a man than Curly, and the most attractive one Turquoise has ever seen.

Curly has been following her, as he often does, and notices the effect Eli has on her. Immediately jealous and angry toward Eli.

Turquoise uses her 'mind-fuzzying' powers to attempt to seduce Eli, partly to simply have him, and also to bring him under her control (as Curly is) which would stop him from his plot against Agatha.

Eli is cunfuddled, but does not give in to Turquoise.

Isabella overhears Turquoise and believes she has been successful in seducing Eli. She is understandably pissed off.

With all that is happening, Agatha finds out about Eli and his plan, wishes to kill him. She has been looking for an excuse to start a war against the rapidly increasing 'good' side lead by Sir Oakly, and now finds her chance.

*WAR, BLOOD, GUTS, VIOLENCE*

Sir Oakly kills Agatha.

Curly is killed shortly after.

Sam is killed. Pam finds her dying, kills himself R & J style. Very thrilling, dramatic death scene & speech highlighting the pointlessness destruction of war, and equality in death.

Turquoise lives but flees the kingdom as soon as she discovers their side is losing.

Isabella and Eli both live, rebuilding the land as it should be, lead now by Sir Oakly.

The End.

ps, Happy Halloween '06!

Old Stuff and New

2006-10-25T19:53:00.000-03:00

The other day Cora (Hardcore) and I did our clothes swap and watched the 10th Kingdom. All 7 hours of it. It's so fabulous. My mom and I watched it again, too. I can't not. It's just so fabulous. And honestly, the Wolf hide and go seek thing is definitely a new fantasy in my brain.

A few days ago I acquired a new pair of boots! Black Kind. Knee high kind. Stiletto kind. Yay! Now I’ve figured out what to be for Halloween, too!.. because I NEEDed to wear these. I’m just going to be a classic witch. I have a great hat I’ve only worn the once. That’s it. I’ll be a sexy witch, with my hooker boots and some short black skirt. Etc. hee hee!! I’m going to V.V. with Kyle tomorrow to seek out our respective Halloween costumes, and there I shall find a short black skirt, since I don’t have one yet.

Last night I began a daunting task, which was to tackle the boxes of my stuff in the basement which I haven’t touched since before we moved into this house 3 years ago!! In them I found things from Grade 8 humanities, and grade 10 science! Etc. There were two things I found, however, which were the best things of all. One was the first sketchbook I ever had (since I became interested in drawing) which I got when we still lived in the Wiltshire house. Looking at the pictures I saw how much I’ve learned and improved. I’m so glad. The Second thing I’ve been looking for for ages! It was an old notebook I have, I think I originally got it from Mel... The bulk of it’s contents are things from back when we were doing HITF (Hole in the Floor)! I rediscovered the play we made up, with Agatha the evil Zebra Queen, Sir Oakly the Owl/Wise man, Curly, Agatha’s henchman in drag, Turquoise, the evil seductress… etc, etc. I found the entire cast list, including who played whom, and the death speech I wrote for ‘Pam,’ the messenger of the evil side who fell in love with the messenger for the good side… hee, I am so thrilled!
In the same book I also found another epic story I began to write, when inspired by a symphony I was forced to sit through, haha. IT is Fabulous, and was why I was looking for the book. I illiustrated 3 pictures to show one of the characters’ change throughout the story, and it makes me so happy. For once I’m starting to feel like writing again!! A miracle.

Mwa ha ha.. I have nothing else to say. So.. Cheers!

Because I'm Feelin Girly Tonight!

2006-09-15T03:32:00.000-03:00

Girliness, girliness.. where to begin? well, I'd say the best way to start a girly conversation is to talk about...

Makeup:

It's my oppinion that you should pick your favorite feature and excentuate it. I do the eyes - many people do the eyes, and then do very little to the lips. I used to be a lip girl, as some people will remember. However, don't listen to me. If you want to do both eyes and lips, go for it. And while your at it throw in some cheekbones. If you don't want any makeup, go for it!! You're beautiful. I keep reading that "what every girl should know" e-mail and get annoyed at it when it tells me not to use mascara on my bottom lashes. Personally, that's bull, since it's my style to do it that way. SO, basically, just find your style, or adapt others to make them your own. WOOT. Girl power ^_~! (ow, that hurt a littlle inside.)

Boys:

Yes, they are dumb. But so are we. Basically we just make sense in our own languages, but need translators to figure out the other one. So speak clearly and use small words, and you might start to figure each other out.
As far as relationships go, chances are there are at least 3 people out there who think you're a total fox and want to date you. The thing is they're too shy to admit it. Trick is to coax it out of them with flirtation and openess.. let me know if this works for anyone, lol... Don't be afraid to be bold. Chances are the guy will like not having to be the one to ask you out.

Hickeys:

Don't just rely on a good foundation to cover up a hickey. While it may work wonders initially, your collar - or the scarf you're mysteriously wearing in the middle of the summer to cover up your love bites - will likely rub that off throughout the day. A good way to cover up the initial redness is a green coverup stick. You can find them in any makeup dept. Then cover that with some foundation. Then do what you like with your hair, or your clothing, or your conspicuous scarves, to cover up the thing. Then smack the boy, and tell him not to do it again. Then give up, cause face it girl - everyone's gonna notice anyway.

Leg Shaving:

It doesn't need to be a special occation to shave your legs, just pamper yourself and then walk around in some flowey pants afterward to enjoy the sensation. On the other hand, just beacause it's a special occasion, you really don't have to. Nobody really cares - they're all more worried about how they look than how you do. Seriously.

Cramps, PMS and Periods:

Repeat after me: IBuprofein is my friend. But never take it on an empty stomach, it'll cause bleeding of the stomache lining. That's bad. More tricks to releive cramps are a) lie flat on your back with your legs elevated (against a wall or on a chair); b) massage your fingertips!! Trust me, it works. REALLY. I don't mean just the very tip, but the whole first joint, the section where the fingernail is. c) drink water. Lots and Lots of water. d) cut back on caffine (i read that one on a pad wraper : P).
PMS? basically the only way to get through that is to sit with a box of chocolates or a bag of chips and watch a whole slew of romantic comedies, the tear jerker kind, and let the tears roll. Catharsis is really a great, non-masochistic way to get your frustration out! Next step is to tell everyone to be patient with you for a day or two.

Nails..?:

Er.. don't.. um.. bite your nails. Yeh.

Excercise and Food:

Pilates all the way, babes! that stuff kicks some friggin ass. Perfect for abs and thighs, especially, therefore perfect for girls! Otherwise, unless you really enjoy going to the gym, don't. It'll just wear down your self esteem. No offense. That's just personal experience talking. To get your excercise, do something active you actually enjoy, like sports if you like them, or get a bike and ride it to work or school instead of the bus or car. Even just walking somewhere every day is a good, mindless way to get excercise. Otherwise you can join some kind of dance class (belly danceing!!), which will get you some excercise without you even realising it.
Apart from the physical stuff, drink lots and lots of water, and eat in moderation. Binge only when absoloutly nessecary. Get all your food groups every day! Always remember, if you're going to eat something unhealthy, breakfast is the best time do to it. Then you have all day to wear it off. Breakfast is extremely important. Never skip breakfast. Lunch should not be skipped either. Dinner is the least important meal, since your body will need the least amount of energy at that point.

This was really fun. I'll have to write more sometime, when I have more to think of. But now it's late, and I have a boy to go see ^_^. Thanks for indulging me.. oh, wait, this is MY blog! I can write whatever i want! haha!!

Lurves,

Rose .:

Mal..

2006-08-25T03:51:00.000-03:00

so.. I've decided to withdraw from Mal this year. I don't want to take the Jazz program, and I never did want to. Yes, it's good because I need to learn piano, and basic theory, but 4-something grand is a little much to pay for those two courses I could get elseplace and still have time for other things.

My life, Instead will be composed of working, yay for the canadian tire gas station, belly dancing lessons that start next teusday, Sharon's choir, and maybe some art. If I can find some art courses. I'm pretty excited about it... Just knowing that I'm not going into the Jazz program takes this big cloud away from other my head, and a huge boulder-like weight thing off my shoulders. Mainly because I know I should want to do it, but I was so unthrilled. I went there and withdrew, and the person made me feel bad about it. psh. i'll show her. right in the face.

What I DO want to take at Mal include things like liberal studies, and art history, and art. NOT Jazz.. I'm very sorry, it seemed like a great program... but it's not what will make me happy right now.

I need to learn how to paint.. I'm getting pretty good at the sketching and shading, but next I wan to learn paint. When I went with Kyle to withdraw from The Jazz program we went to the bookstore, and I drooled uncontrolably over art supplies. I think that says something.

Tonight I get to go to Youth group again!! I'm psyked, I've missed it. And this year I have less things standing in my way of going. Namely School.

When I get a new computer I have to remember to get a firewire and video editing software.. I can't not have that option, it sucks.. If only I'd had one when I was doing the video with derek, we would have actually gotten somewhere with it. I think it was not too bad, we could have won something.. sigh. But now I'm too old to enter the behind the smokescreen contest. Oh well, Derek will help me find other video contests, so hopefully I'll have annother chance to explore that passion.. wow, I really have no Idea what i want to do with my life!!
kk, i have acting, illiustrating, or directing. unless I find something better. sigh. I hope i figure it out!!

anyway, whatever.. I have my whole life to do that. I'm done now, I've got a youth group to go to! *dun du-du-daaaah!!!*

cheers .:

Birthdays rock my socks off

2006-08-10T17:59:00.000-03:00

Yesterday was my birthday party, it was fabulous. We went to Alexandria's, because I'm new and inventive. 'Twas semi-formal (ish), and people are very pretty. I got to dress up, which is always fun. Kyle wore his suit, looking very dashing. He might (knock on wood) get the position of manager at Galexy, in which case he'd be aloud to wear a suit to work whenever he wanted. I would be pleased, because he ought to always wear one. lol.

Most of us had very good food (their ceasar salad is fabulous... mm, I love garlic), but Nicole and Olivia had no luck. Olivia was very very vocal about her dislike, which was a shame, I hope they didn't get offended. but meh!

I opened prezies at the table, and was much pleased by goodies. Many of the goodies smell nice, too. This morning I smell like lush grapefruit hair and body gel, and my house smells like rose insence! It's much fun. I'm currently trying to hack into an enormous chocolate bar. I'm excited! Omg, very tastey.

After dinner we came home (my home) for hangy-outyness. I used my new fabulous sketch pad from Talissa to draw Stef. It was a very rough sketch, and I think I could do much better.. but it looked a bit like her : P.. Now I have Martha wanting me to make one of her. It's so much fun doing those, I havn't done many in my life. I mean portraits. I think I should do more. I did one for Laura (cute spanish Laura) in Acting 11 for secret 'santa', and I was uber pleased with how it turned out. I don't even think I have a picture of it, though!..

We spent rest of party talking and listening/singing along to Rent. Martha and I acted out "Light my Candle" and "Take me or leave me." It was extremely entertaining, at least for us :P. I almost knocked .. many things over in the process. Finally the party decided to wind down. I sat chatting with Talissa Darren and Stef til 5 to 1, when the latter two realised they had curfews. It was much fun. Then Talissa stayed up til 2:30 chatting, which was exactly what I needed. Talissa = very good conversation, always.

This morning we watched Sleepy Hollow, and i got about 5 phone calls in succesion, all for me. Not only very bissare, but rare! No one ever calls me. And now I'm listening to Rent again and writing this. I love Collins' voice.

Speaking of birthdays, mine was actually on July 31st. It, itself, was great. It was the day after Fiddler's last day. At 12 at the cast party everyone sung me happy birthday, which was awesome, and a little overwhelming, but once again, awesome. Then I left, to get good sleep, which was probably good. No sleep mixed with all the drama that a cast party always entails (and apparently which this one held, so as not to disapoint), it would have put a damper on my birthday. As it was, my brain had enough trouble. It had trouble trying to decide if it was in post-show let down mode, or happy birthday mode, or happy giddy high off Kyle mode. It made me an odd person to be around, I'm sure.

Kyle's present was rather fabulous. 6 seperate presents, actually, all with separate notes attached to them. In short form: first I got a dosen roses (scattered around in the box). Then a box of chocolates, which never goes wrong. Then a gorgeous figure of a man sweeping a woman off her feet (omg, wow). Next was my favorite Salvador Dali Painting, of a floating sleeping woman being pointed at by a long rifle. It (or she) is about to be attacked by a female tiger, who is jumping out of the mouth of a yawning and stretching male tiger, who is coming out of a giant orage-pink fish, who is jumping out of a giant pomegranite. There's an elephant with long stilt legs in the background, in classic S.D. style, and in the foreground a bee flies around annother pomegranite. Any painter who draws pomegranites in his paintings immediately gets my attention.

5th Kyle gave me a plaque that says "Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take but by the moments that take your breath away." 6th he gave me him. Which had the most romantic note ever. ever. ever. I would have swooned if I were the type. As it is, I was speachless. Which, apparently, was his intention : P.

That evening my mother took me to Moxies for a very late dinner and a white chocolate brownie... which we shared, yet still couldn't finnish. That's a first! But a good sign, I think.

:..:

The other day Cora held a Disney Party, which I went to right after hanging out with Kyle, so was already in a rather fabulous mood. It was the most fun ever. I dressed as Tinkerbell, and supplied Cora with her Snow White costume, which I was very proud of. Bofore everyone else showed up we took the dog out on a walk, and had many entertaining/entertained looks from passers-by. Altogether we ate A&W and watched Aladin. And talked. good stuff. and hilarity.

I go off to camp on Saturday! that's a lie. I go to Phantom on Saturday, then show up at camp as early as possible on Sunday. I'm very excited. I didn't really enjoy some of last year, appart from getting to know Leigh and Jase, because I was one of the eldest there, and definately one of the most mature. This year I'm going as a leader, so it's going to be way better. It's Moorecroft's last year. I can't believe it. I don't know how I'll deal with not having a chance to see Vespers Point every year. It's my favorite place.
However! I'll be gone for a whole week! with no means of communication with anyone. I've grown too used to the luxury of electronics. But It's only a week, and I'll live. Haha.

Thats all for now.

Foreign Countries, Famous Peoples and Fiddlers

2006-07-29T15:47:00.000-03:00

My sister left Friday to go to Peru to dig up old dead people and other artefacts. Just because she's THAT cool. Honestly, she's fulfilling the dream job, that every kid wanted to do when they grew up. Thats what it was for me, anyway. Every kid, at least once, wants to be an arceologist (or paleantologist [I can't spell]), or a vet or a famous pop singer, or teacher. those were the popular ones in my elementary school, as far as I remember. I was realising how different each of us (my sister, brother and myself) have gone in our lives... My sister uses her brains, and her going on 5 years of university, and will either be an arceologist, or work with forensics. My brother is a hippie, doing outdoorsy, manual things like guiding kyacks to far-off destinations on 5 day trips. I am taking the third path, using my emotional and artsy skills, acting, writing and drawing. I'll probably be freelancing most of my life. When I mentioned this, my dad called us the perfect patonic family. Plato apparently said that a well ballanced person should be an even mixture of appetite, intellect and spirit. In this case my brother is appetite, my sister intellect and myself spirit.

My sister and I went to my dad's a few days ago for supper, before she had to leave for Peru. When we were there I remenbered the picture my dad has on one of his walls, of Louis Armstrong with my Grandpa, Bill McNeil. I Love that picture. Look at their faces! It's fabulous how terribly happy they look. It always makes me proud, so I thought I'd brag a little about it by putting it on here.
Indulge me. haha.

Goo (My grandpa) used to interview people for CBC. That's why he has this picture. It made remember my grandma's singing (on the other side), but I was never alive when she could sing, so I've never heard her. She was an opera singer. Apparently CBC should have some recordings of her in their archives, so one day I'll have to investigate.

Today was day one of fiddler, with a disasterous first show (involving a dead orc extra), and a glorious 2nd show. We got a standing O on the night performance! I think we did very, very well without the orc extra in the first performance, though. Especially considering. This was probably because we were so freaked out about it that we were all on our toes in focused alertness. I almost hyperventalated happily, when I started laughing because Darren had mannaged to say the "and all important men in town will come to fawn on me" part as fast as it had to be to be fit in. We were using the CD for the whole afternoon insted of the machine. Stupid Machines. Whoever thinks computers will one day take over the world has never met an Orc Extra. Gnarm. Gnarm indeed.

My birthday is in two days! And then I'll be 18. It's not a particularly monumentous age, though. I feel like I've been 18 already for months. New things I am able to do include buying/renting porn and being naked on stage. WOOT. Oh, and I guess now I'm old enough to perform in Rocky Horror. Ha, took me long enough. But I still only ever want to play an usherette. Oh, and I can get married without my parents' permission. Okay, I guess there's a few things I can do when I'm 18. Not that I'll do any of them. So I suppose age 16 is all about responsability (driving), 18 is a sort of right of passage (all the sexual things and 'adult' things are then allowed) and 19 is all about the addictions (drinking, gambling). Weird. I don't know what my point is. But I am enjoying rambling.

I officially signed up for the jazz program today. And My mother paid the fee. I'm official! Most days I'm off by 2, and on panto days I'll be off by 6 at the very latest. This is a very good thing! So I get to be in Panto this year. This is my decision! Mwa ha ha ha.

Where should I travel to? My brother has been to Japan, and my sister to both Prague and Peru. My sister told me I'd go to New York. But that isn't exceptionally exotic and exciting. Maybe I'll go to Spain. Or Italy! Oh, How I'd adore to visit Venice. And go to Florence and get an official carnival mask! it might be less expensive than the ones they sell in victoria, from the Italian city itself. *drool*... I talked with the woman selling them at the folkfest in Victoria, and she guessed at once that I was a theatre kid. apparently we're always the ones oggling the masks (and maybe also the ones who can never buy them!)... But I'm making my own mask, it's half the face and shiney, with a wing-like thing above the left eyebrow. It's going to be so pretty when I've painted it. I only wish it weren't so bumpy. thats what comes from using plaster. gnarm. Hee.

I'm going to bed now. I'm getting up early tomorrow. For Brunch with Kyle! I'm so pleased!

Have good sleeps.

Penguin Jokes

2006-07-12T02:04:00.000-03:00

Two Penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One of them says to the other, "Could you pass the soap?" The other one says, "what do I look like? A Microwave!?"

Why don´t Penguins like rock music?
They only like sole.

A penguin walks into a Bakery and says, "I'd like to buy some bread." The baker looks at him and says, "Alright, what kind would you like? White or Brown?" The penguin replies, "It doesn't matter. I'm riding my bike home."

A penguin walked into a bar and asked for a sandwich and a pint. The bartender was astounded by this talking flightless bird and asked about his life. The penguin went on to explain that he was working at the building site across the road.
Weeks went by and the penguin became a regular lunchtime fixture at the bar.
One day a circus came to town and who should walk into the pub, but the ringmaster. He started chatting to the barman and learnt of the talking penguin who frequented his establishment. Amazed at this and somewhat skeptical, the ringmaster retorted that if this was true then he would draw in the crowds with an act such as a talking Antarctic bird. The barman said that the penguin should be in soon as it was nearly lunchtime. So the King of the Ring sat in the corner and waited.
Sure enough in walked the penguin and ordered his pint of Guinness and his tuna sandwich. The ringmaster walked over after hearing the penguin's food request to introduce himself to the amazing bird.
"Hello there," said the Ringmaster, "I run the circus that's in town and I am always on the lookout for new talent. Can I offer you a job?"
"Is it that big tent in the park?" said the penguin.
"Yes," replied the Ringmaster.
"The big round tent with the pole sticking out at the top and the flaps and ropes?"
"Yes, Yes my feathered friend."
"Don't be daft," said the penguin. "I'm a plasterer!" and walked back to the building site.

A penguin walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, "That'll be $10." The penguin pays and the bartender serves him his drink, saying, "You know, we don't get many penguins coming in here, you know." The penguin says, "At $10 a beer, it's not hard to understand."

A penguin walked into a bar and asked the barman, "Do you have any plums?" The barman lookd at him and answered, "No, this is a bar. We only serve chips and beer." The penguin walked out.
The next day the penguin walked in again. "Do you have any plums?" The barman looked at him. "I told you yesterday we only serve chips and beer." The penguin walked out, only to return the next day.
"Do you have any plums?" The barman now angry told the penguin, "Look I told you the other day no we don't serve plums. We only serve beer and chips an if you ask again i will nail your flippers to the floor" The penguin walked out again.
The next day the penguin returned. "Do you have any nails?" The barman looked at the penguin and replied "No" The penguin looked hopeful. "Ok then... Do you have any plums???"

Two penguins are standing on an iceberg.One penguin says to the other, "You look like you're wearing a tuxedo." The other penguin replies, "Who says I'm not?"

Two Microwaves are sitting in a bathtub. One of them says to the other, "Could you pass the soap?" The Other replies, "What do I look like? A Penguin!?"

Non-penguin Jokes.

What do elephants do at 5:00 in the morning?
They hide in the forest and jump out of trees.

How to you get an elephant into a Fridge?
Open the door, shove in the elephant, and close the door.

Two sausages are sitting in a pan. One says to the other, "Gee, it sure is getting hot in here." The other replies, "Oh my god, a talking sausage!!"

What's brown and sticky?
A stick.

How do you get a giraffe into a fridge?
Open the door, take out the elephant, shove in the giraffe and close the door.

Why are aligators flat?
They wander about the forest at 5:00 in the morning.

A frog walked (hoped) into a bank. He aproached the nearest teller, who's nametag read 'Patricia MacDonald'. The frog said to her, "I would like to take out a loan." Patricia wasn't sure that their bank allowed animals to take out loans, however since she wasn't cruel, she decided to go ahead with it. After all, the frog could talk. She asked him, "do you have any credit?" The frog reached into his pocket and pulled out a tiny, pink plastic elephant, and placed it on the table, winking at her. Feeling rather confused, Pat excused herself and brought the elephant to her manager. "Sir," she asked, "There's a frog outside who wants to take out a loan. He gave me this," Pat placed the elephant on her manager's desk. "What is this anyway?" The manager smiled and said, "It's a nick-nack, Patty Mac. Give the frog a Loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

Three men walk into a bar. You'd have thought one of them would have seen it.

Just My Day

2006-07-10T02:53:00.000-03:00

I think I want to try out for studio 58 next year. If Devon can make it in one year out of high school, so can I!... I'm afraid of auditioning for Randolph. well, not auditioning, just afraid i might get in. Then I'd have to move to Toronto, and that scares me.

I had a dream last night I was in a really kick-ass versian of Cinderella. I don't think it was a musical. but there were alot of sub-stories and such, so you got to know the characters so much better. I wasn't supposed to be in it, but all of a sudden I was on stage, in a really poofy dress. So instead of screaming and running offstage, I gained composure, put on a condecending expression and looked stage left, where the coach and Cindie were just arriving back from the ball. It was actually quite exciting, but then my body was like, "you're using too much independant thought. wake up now." So I woke up. So that bit. HA.

Laura's Rocky Horror party was fun. we all got to be dressed up sluttily, which is always a plus. I wore an innocent looking dress first, as janet, but soon disrobed into later-janet, in fishnets and a slip. and black evening gloves for effect. hee. I thought I looked decent. we watched the movie and threw props. it was great!

Arts Alive starts tomorrow. It's about time, I was starting to feel summer-y! you know, today I spent the whole... er, well, I guess only after 6... but the rest of the day alone and bored! I attempted to watch TV while putting a layer of plaster on the mask I'm making. It's gonna be pretty. I watched an old that 70's show while I did it. Two, actually. The first one had pre Eric leaving and post Dona blondify-ing. the second was and old classic. it made me sad that they've changed it from being cool to being lame. they should have just quit while they were ahead!

okay, i'm done talking for today. I just thought i should make a post since it's been a few days.

Life is wonderful.

"The only interesting answers are those which destroy the questions." - Susan Sontag, American Writer

Best I ever had - Vertical Horizon

2006-06-29T23:14:00.000-03:00

I love that song, it makes me so bittersweet-ly happy. Plus, it's very fun to sing.

I realised recently that my first crush on a famous person was on Cat Stevens. Not JTT or Devon Sawa or Taylor Hanson, who were among ones I later fancied, but an old, creepy singer (with an admittedly gorgeous voice) who later changed his name to Yusuf Islam. Wtf? This was somewhere in the ages between 6 and 10. I used to listen to "Wild World" and imagine he and his band walking down my giant staircase singing to me.
What makes the creepiness of me even more vivid is the songs I chose as my particular favorites. They of course included such nice ones as "Wild World" and "Moonshadow," but they also include two songs, called "Lady D'Arbanville" and "Sad Lisa." The former is a man trying to wake up his lover who has died in her bed. The latter is more cryptic, yet I believe it's about depression, and Lisa is an animorphication of the emotion inside him.
I was a CREEPY child. Ah well, the liking of Cat Stevens is a foreshadowing of the love I have for old actors like Ben Kingsley and Alan Rickman over Orlando Bloom or Keanu Reeves. Uuughh... Gross.

We're graduating tomorrow. Woopdeedoo. But I'm looking forward to dry grad. And singing. I have a pretty dress to wear now.
I get to go to Victoria on Sunday! Yay. I'm visiting my sister. I'm not much looking forward to the bus ride with no means of playing music. And singing aloud is generally less appreciated on a closed bus.. which is bunk.. oh well, I'll just have to read and draw. Maybe I'll get pretty far into The Red Tent. That would be uber-neat.

You guys have to check out the painting I made! It's the prettiest I've ever made on this site, it's of a fairy. Just click the link over there ----> entitled "Pretty Picture I Drew!".. or something along those lines.
I don't have much else to say at this moment. Happy happy joy joy!

Lurves.

Houses

2006-06-19T14:00:00.000-03:00

Kay guys, people are dumb.. but I did say I'd be a Ravenclaw! I went on a bored HP house-placing spree just now. One site put me in Ravenclaw, but one put me in Slytherin.

----- "Ravenclaw!You are so smart! Hey,just because you are smart you aren't a nerd.You are probably very creative.You don't get too worked up in new situations,and probably enjoy them.You get to use your mind and try to figure out what will happen next.You probably also like to daydream all the time.Wake up!Did you hear any of that or were you in your own little world?" -----

----- "Slytherin: You are cunning and sly, and you tend to be full of yourself." ------

I find that amusing.

But My favorite site, that I went to later for the character quiz, Put me first in Gryfindor, then 2nd Hufflepuff. Ravenclaw was 3rd! I was surprised, but hey, they all Hufflepuffs "patient, hardworking, and loyal" so there.

But I do see the Gryfindor thing.. when I was doing a really awesome test a long time ago for which character you were I was Dumbledore, and he was a Gryfindor.
I took it again just now and he was again my #1 Result! yay. Next was Hermione, then Bill Weasley, then Hagrid. you should check it out, it's got many possible results and a complex scoring system, which leads me to think it's neat! http://selectsmart.com/FREE/select.php?client=hpcharacter

Now, another site made me a Hufflepuff. and annother! but that one was a raven/huff split. Sigh. I'm sick of this game, heh!

This day I plan to do things I need to do, like loading my pictures onto my computer, and cleaning my room. and I'm not allowed to have a shower or do anything out of the house until the fridge repair guy comes. And those guys are always late, and sometimes don't even come on the day they're supposed to. That pisses me right off. But he's still got time, ha.

-

okay, he came, my fridge is permanently broken, we're gonna buy a new one today. and no, I can't haggle to save my life. well, if it was to save my life maybe i'd give it a try, but this ain't to save my life. so there. now im gonna go have my shower i've been waiting for. yay!

Scholarship Night

2006-06-11T15:34:00.000-03:00

Scholarship night was tonight!! 3 hours of straight clapping, gnarm gnarm gnarm... But I got a $1000 scholarship/award! Half is unattatched to schoolness, so I think I'm going to put it toward a computer! I got it for dedication toward my feild of study, or somethin like that.
-
Megan and I sang at 2/3 time, the 2nd intermission, "When You Believe" from the Prince of Egypt. J'adore that song. We were pretty! I had my cold, but I think it made me sound sultry, ha! People I didnt even know came up to me afterwards. It made me happy! My head I'm sure has grown twice it's size...

MY GOD. I finally discovered Wicked the Musical. I'm in love! I think my favorite songs are a tie between The Wizard and I, What is this Feeling (Loathing), Defying Gravity, and No Good Deed, which I'd love to do sometime. ha, not no good deed, but I'd love to sing the song. HA! Though the first song, No One Mourns the Wicked, is awesome. It'd be great to do, but only with a few million people.
-
I want to play Alfie. It'd be fun to be painted green! I discovered that the chick who's voice it is is Moureen, from Rent. It's awesome! Glinda's voice sounds like Seussical's Gertrude, though I'm not sure about that one.

We're almost out, guys! 3 days left until highschool is over for good! I'm scared shitless. I need a job!! If anyone can think of a good place for job-ness that's hireing, tell me! It'd be great if it was at Rutherford, of course, since then I could walk easily, and not even get sweaty. Maybe HasBeans would like a foxy young red-head... hmmm...

I'm so happy, everythings goin good, I'm happy, my friends are happy, school's almost out, and everything's comming up roses! I like roses! They're the best of the flowers, mostly cuz they match my name, but I really like their smell when they're still on the bush, or very fresh.

Abstract thought for the day: Would you rather kiss a frog or a raven?

"Oh, I'm so inadequate- and I love myself!" - Meg Ryan, American Actress

Rose .:

But I'm le tired..

2006-06-09T22:36:00.000-03:00

I finally figured out the picture thing! only too me.. oh, a year and a half or so.. that is far too complicated for its own good. I say 'bah' to it. BAH.

Anyhoo! I saw Cars last night. It was rather amusing. Though the fact that it was so late, making me giggly, and the fact that I was with Kyle, making me giggly, may have tainted my vote. Honestly, they're really going overboard on the whole "talking-animals-escaping-zoo/domestic-captivity movie" thing, there was YET ANOTHER previewed with Cars, this time with a bear and a deer. gnarm. Really, they should just stop trying all together. Cars was entertaining. I liked that they all had very distinct eye colours. of course, I first noticed this when I realised that the eyes of the rusty, dim-witted pickup truck were the same colour as mine. hee! he was a cute little pickup truck. I was particulerly amused when a couble of car-groupies flashed the main guy.
SO, as a consequence of going to a 12:30 movie, I got very little sleep last night. again. tee hee. so I'm pooped. I should be in bed, but i was making hot chocolate and playing with sign language.

Sign language! We're learning sign language! just for fun. But it's much fun. I'm so happy i've learned so much in just.. well, mostly just today. I have the alphabet down, and a few basic sentences, and tons of random words. Tonight I learned "bullshit" and "Forever." It'll be an uber awesome skill to have in the long run - I've always wanted to learn it, but never gotten around to it.

So I was gonna hang out at Cora's today, and I did for a while, but I got uber tired, so came home.. not much good it did me, apparently. I brought Empire Records, so left them watching it. I felt bad for being so lame and leaving early, but I'm sick and need to be home, specially with closing night for the show tomorrow. It's goin' awesome, btw. the audiences have been surprisingly good.

okay, i'd go on about nothing, but that's dull and i'm dying of tired-ness. so, Loves to you all. Peace, YO, my home dawgs... god, please forget that.

"It is possible that blondes also prefer gentlemen." - Mamie Van Doren, American singer

Rose .:

Rediscovered!!

2006-06-05T01:39:00.000-03:00

SO, I was inspired to re-discover my blog, and then discovered that my last post was over a year ago. HA! shows how dedicated I am!... Just got back from Departures and Arrivals Dress Rehersal. we're awesome. I need to get a tight, short black dress, cuz one of my costumes it HAWT. speaking of which, I can't wait til informal formal teusday. It's gonna be kickass, and I've still only worn that white dress once. and it's hot! gnarm!!!
you must all come see it (the play), and cheer for me. And I guess for Sasja and Nick and Jen and Niki and Vanessa, too, if you must. June 7th to 10th. oh, and for the ppl in the other play, ha. Sasja and Jen and I are going to write a kickass surreal play. and We plan for Will to make his fedorra productions thing put it on.. in .. um.. 25 years. yEH!

Everyone must visit http://www.kristopherfulton.com!! the 2nd song that plays is "Llega la Hora" [jegga la 'ora] and we sang it at BCYC... cept we did it better.. hee, i'm not biased or anything. Well, our versian was the SATB versain, too, which I think is even better. On the site I also really enjoy "A Girl" and "As if in Flight." I swear I've heard the latter one in a movie. if I havn't I want to PUT it in a movie.

I'm much enjoying my life right now. 2 weeks til school's over! that's scary. Tomorrow I need to call Mal-U about the Jazz audition. I got a scolarship! don't know which one yet, but i hope it's something good. HA! I'm singing at the cerimony with Megan B, and we're also doing The grad cer. with Stef Mc-G and Crystal Cashmore. and skills for life grad. it's pretty sweetawesome, if you don't mind me using the word, Hil. I have to e-mail randolph academy about auditioning... eeeeeew. not about randolph, but about leaving nanaimo. I dont care what other people say, I'm not ready to face the world yet. and I need a Job. and a drivers liscence. eeeeeeeeeeeeeeew. Back on happy topics, though, much enjoying Kyle, too. a tee hee hee, that's uber happy, right there. and i just bought my straitener! and a hot shirt. so yay! kk, my mom want's the computer. cheers!

"23 mags and my swingin' cod. that's all" <-- learn this quote and other greats by becoming a "Firefly" geek!

Rose .:

Prom '05

2005-05-01T19:19:00.000-03:00

Rabbit Rabbit!

hey ladies, I know it's been a while since i last posted anything, but hey, I'm lazy... meh!

Prom '05 was last night! wooooot! Twas grand.

First we admired peoples' tuxes and dresses, and I gabbled (word i just made up for 'talked') with my friends from the christian school. Then Mel, Geoff, Brianna, Gareth, Laura, Tim, Macky and I sat at a table interestingly all the way across the room from our other Dover Bay comerades, but that's OK, we joined them later on. We had sat down at the United Nations table, and it was wonderful... I admit, for all our sakes... I am... and I think we all are... very big geeks. We started pretending we were UN people (I was Spain) and banging on the table, making corney history jokes... for example, we imagined what it would be like for them to make prom a WWII theme.. "Looks like the treaty of versilles table is falling over..."; "Wheres the Jewish table?" "it's gone."; "Wheres the German Table?" "They've joined with Poland..." ... oh dear. most fun ever!

Then was food... which was good. Not much else to say about that.

Then there was dancing... oooh, the dancing.... I imidiately took off my shoes. I tend to be against the pracitice of foot-binding in Canada in the 21st century...

I kept getting stepped on... there's a giant purble briuse on my foot from a slight moshing accident during American Idiot ... which was one of the night's highlights. We'd (lots of us) just sat down for a breather during a crappy hip hop song, and when the song changed it hardly had a chance to play the first note before the whole group of us got up and rushed to the front of the dance floor... I swear, it should have been filmed!

There were quite a few great times like that... Thunderstruck was grand, as was Bohemian Rhapsody, Girls just wanna have fun, that super-rave song with no words that i dont know the name of... Cotton-eyed Joe!... Apparently the Wellies got cheated out of good slow songs, but we had a good number of them... like take my breath away... I wish it had been the origional, though... it's so much better.

Though, ye know, scrolling back up there, crappy hip hop sings were at a minimun this time! I've only been to two other highschool dances in my life, a christmas one and an all schools, and the whole time at both they ONLY played crappy hip hop songs, so I never had much fun.. this time it was a lower #, which is nice: ).

ahh yes, twas fun... and the short barb-after-party was fine cuz we were all so tired.. though most went to others after... but i was glad to go to bed when i got home... my legs ached and my feet stung... and i was cold! damn those slinky black dresses!!!

Ah, yay for prom... til next year! then I'll be a faerie! ... >^..^< ...

Cheers loves!

Rose .:

Catharsis - Natalie MacMaster

2005-03-14T17:32:00.000-04:00

^ ^ ^ ^ ^ Listen to that song. Je l'aime.

I'm a writer. I write for the same reason that I read. To create a new reality for myself, to escape into, whenever i can't stand this one.. In books I read about restless young heros and heroines itching for excitment and adventure, and the story takes them where they need to go... they get to scratch their itch. I've got an itch! why dont we live in an old world, with dragons and sorcerers and enchantments? I would love to become a sorcerer's apprentice. Or to go on a quest to find a relic which will cure the whole town from some dreaded desiese, and on the way meet a talking dragon, who would teach me how to fly, and save a flock of children from an enchanted castle, and have to fight and defeat a horrifying sorcerer who wants to carry me away to a place where I'd never see my friends or family ever again! And have a fearie fall in love with me, and drink a poison in my stead just so i would live. Then come back home, not to find that it's all my imagination, but that I do live in a world full of faeries and magic and damsels in distress and heroic princes and stubourn rebel peasant girls and evil step mothers and happily ever afters.

**sigh**

I'm in sore need for adventure. I may be going to Switzerland next year, in May. But as soon as I graduate, I'm either going 'cross Canada, to Paris, or to New Zealand... and maybe I'll write an award-winning novel, and meet a dashing young man who'll want to take me home with him, but I can't, and I'll want to bring him home with me, but he can't.. and it'll all be very sad and romantic and sappy. And Then I'll come back home. And no one will be dying from some terrible enchantment, and the lights in the water will be phosferessants.. not faeries..
wont that be a charming little story to write?.. no one will read it. but then, perhaps I will.

Well, I'm off on another whirlwind adventure, to read Goblet of Fire... Yay for being forced to stay home sick.
Cheers.

Nerd, Geek & Dork

2005-03-02T01:31:00.000-04:00

Tonight I was having an in-depth discussion with Jake and Lindsay.. well, more of an arguement, with Jake. See, It began with me refering to myself as a "Drama Geek", when he "corrected" me by calling me a drama "nerd". I was, naturally insulted by this comment, and scolded him. in his opinion, "Nerd", as a title, was the more positive conitation.. the lesser of two evils, if you will, and "Geek" was the smart, greasy one with glasses and a lab coat. I was shocked and appauled by this. MY opinion is as follows:

Nerd is a word for an extremely stereotypical indavidual, usually well-rounded, who is pretty much good at every subject... though athletics and the arts are sometimes optional. This creature may be found with their t-shirts tucked into their pants, socks rolled over pant bottoms, and ALWAYS wear glasses. Often traveling alone, this species is rarely found, and some believe them to be a myth, or extinct.

A geek is a much more common creature. Able to camoflauge itself with its surroundings, this animal is usually good at several subjects, with special expertise in a particular area (eg. drama geek, band geek etc.). Usually found in larger groups, commonly with better fasion sense than the nerd.

A dork? The connotation of a dork is often debated, and changed. Literally, it means the genitalia of a male whale. However, my interperatation of a dork is usually negative, meaning somone idiotic or moronic, usually without the sense that he or she is doing it. "Dork" is rarely said with highly malicious nature, being fairly mild an insult.

And Lindsay said something about a nerd being related to science, a geek math (the word geek was pink and ... i think it was blue), and a dork just a more stupid person. .. or one who did embarassing things like read fan fics... she was, of course speaking of herself. Silly Lindsay! Then I must be one, too!! yaaaaaaay Harry Potter!

Thats really all i had to say... I'll have to write a story about this sometime... Release your inner geek!!
Ciao.

oh, procrastination, i am hamlet's kin! who talked and talked and ne'r did a thing!

2005-02-28T23:36:00.000-04:00

So... yeh. what did everyone think of the oscars? I was hoping for Leo to win best actor - hes an awesome actor, he just doesnt get the chance to show off often enough... and common, he was up against Jamie Foxx for Ray, anyway!... ah well. but i was glad about Cate Blanchette.

i'm confused about this bloody blog thing... do you really need to download this "hello" thing to put on pictures!?!? cuz... that bites... i tried dwnlding it but i couldnt figure it out, so i deleted it again... *sigh*... i'll need help from you professional bloggers. stupid blog-ness. nothing's straight forward! they want you to do all this fancy pants stuff for the simplest things!... I'm not smart!!!!!
Fair well, my only profound sayings are dumb ones. and all too often repeated. so i'll spare you for now. cheers.

woot! first blog!

2005-02-27T14:59:00.000-04:00

Yes. I have, at last, sucommed to the evil temptaions of you blogger people.. i see the light! Woot for blogs!! AAAGGGHHHH!!!! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . oh well. now, im not making this a public ranting page like some of you people do, lol, but no, this will mostly be a thoughts page.. for story ideas, and other randomness. I'm QUITE looking forward to it..
So, Oscar Party tonight!! .. no, not Buzzard and Akin's... I'm going to my moms boss's!.. that sound so wierd. but its so much fun! I've gone every year since... i dont know when. She gets the ballot sheets off the internet and we go and pay a donation to get in and have a ballot sheet, and we wear costumes for according to characters in the nominated movies. There are prises for best costume and for most correct guesses. And, of course, a booby prise for least. Last year's costume winner went as an oscar!... I'm either going as a faerie from finding neverland or as Christine Daae... hopefully christine, but i have to see what i have. C'est bon. tee hee. Im listening to the fresh prince of bel air!!!!!!! ahh, the good ol' days. BEFORE Will Smith was cool.
Ye know what? currently i have absoloutly nothing else to talk about. SO, until next time... whenever that might be...
Cheers!